


Hemorrhoids

by IrenkaFeralKitty



Series: Rogue Squadron Shorts [5]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: X-Wing Series - Aaron Allston & Michael Stackpole, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Gen, Wes is suffering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-28
Updated: 2019-02-28
Packaged: 2019-11-07 05:06:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17954135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IrenkaFeralKitty/pseuds/IrenkaFeralKitty
Summary: The price of rebellion can be high.





	Hemorrhoids

“On a slightly different note,” Wedge said as the briefing wounding down, “Medical asked me to pass on a notification.” He paused, clearing his throat as he studiously stared at his datapad. “Following the recently flurry of missions requiring snubfighter pilots to remain confined to their cockpits for several days with little reprieve, an outbreak of hemorrhoids had been reported. As such, each pilot will be receiving a file with care and treatment instructions, and an inflatable oblong pillow is being added to your cockpit medical kits. Additionally, the mechanics have promised to better prioritize replacing worn flight seats.”

“That seems a tad extreme,” Tycho drawled. 

“Just because it didn’t happen to you,” Wes began from the back of the room. 

Hobbie raised his hand slightly, interrupting his wingmate. “Question. Does this file come with a mobile medical droid or something? Because I’m tired of having to help Wes change-”

Either picking up on Wedge’s sudden breath or Tycho’s widening eyes, or perhaps just knowing Wes as well as he did, Hobbie ducked to one side as a datapad fly towards his head with deadly accuracy.

Glaring, Wes rocked back into a normal position and dropped his arm. His feet were tired after spending the entire briefing either leaning against a wall or walking back and forth, and being teased about a painful, and annoying, medical issue was not improving his mood.

Wedge scooped up the thrown datapad and sent Wes a scolding look. “Wes, don’t throw things. No,” he continued looking at Hobbie, “there are no new medical services being offered and Tycho? Do not pick on Wes. He’s suffering enough as is.”

“I hate you all,” Wes hissed.

“Wes? Behave or I’ll be forced to assign you to a survey mission just to get you away from everyone.”


End file.
